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Writer's pictureEhra Dizon

Dear Insecurity

Insecurity refers to something that a person dislikes about themselves. In society, it is either how you look or how you act. I'd like to believe that insecurity was never a word that should have been normalized, especially among the youth. Children have been raised with expectations from society, and as they get older, they continue to live by those expectations.


Insecurities can also arise from comparing oneself to others. "If only I looked like her," "Maybe if I had less of this and more of that, I'd be happy with the way I look," are some of the phrases that frequently come out of people's mouths. This means that society has created a norm that has led us to believe that other people do fit in, whereas some have to try harder.


Women learned that having slim arms, a small waist, zero belly fat, wide hips, and flawless legs get you accepted by society. Men were taught to hold their emotions in—that it was soft to admit weakness. Society has once more provided the best illustration of an unbalanced environment; it has detrimental effects that will leave people scarred for a long time.


If I had the chance to make a promise to those who have been scarred, I would tell them that being a certain size will not make you love yourself, receiving thousands of compliments will not make you smile in the mirror, and prioritizing other’s opinions will prevent you from becoming who you want to be. They will have something to argue with regardless of how hard you strive to meet their expectations. Being someone because of others is not a successful route. Being someone because it's who you want to be is a success. You are here to live, not to survive.


You're not alone. Everyone is trying to figure out why they aren't like someone else. Why? We'd all been told to change something, add something, or get rid of something about ourselves. Everyone else is still looking for the answer in their own unique ways, but the answer has been, and always will be, nothing. True beauty has no rules. In reality, being beautiful is a societal construct that ultimately ends up being destructive. True beauty exists within you, whether you are still working on accepting yourself, or have already done so.


Recognizing the existence of unrealistic beauty standards is the key to opening our hearts to ourselves. We should recognize how impractical it is to meet society's unrealistic standards. We should think of ourselves as a painting in a museum. At first glance, it may appear to be a smear of colored paint all over the place. However, each abstract work has its own unique meaning—it has its own worth and value. Exactly like us. We should get to know who we truly are and understand that who we are is beautiful in and of itself.

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